Thought for the month
Waves is a series of thought-provoking essays on a wide range of themes.
This month's reflection, 'busyness', is by Chris Blakeley.
Busyness is also addictive. It is founded in our own self importance and pride - our desire to impress, to be needed, to over-control and shape things to our own narrow will and purposes. After all, who are you when you are not being busy.......?
Hence the need for the kind of systematic disciplined approach that Abbot Christopher Jameson advocates in his book, 'Finding sanctuary'. 'Sanctuary' is the 'antidote' to buysness - a centred place from which it is possible to live our lives in a productive, virtuous manner. "The basic starting point", he writes, "is the quality of your day to day dealings with other people. You cannot mistreat people one moment and find sanctuary the next. Finding the sacred space begins with the recognition of the sacred in your daily living.."
Why not pause, at the end of a busy day, or week, and pay conscious attention to what is sacred in your life - simply review how you have done that week against the things that really matter to you - find one thing to rejoice in and one thing to be more vigilant of....... it might help busyness loose its grip on you.
And, of course, that's an interesting question in itself... 'what is sacred in my life...?'
What do you see?
Consider this:
A tree, standing in the midst of a clump of trees. Standing a little taller than the rest, able to catch the breeze. Contrast of green, light and dark shades. Interplay of light, shadow and shape. Each tree different, each one unique. This tree standing in the midst of a clump of trees, being what it was made to be.. Standing a little taller than the rest, able to catch the gentle breeze in its leaves. A tree standing in the midst of a clump of trees.
I wrote this some time ago while looking out of my window one morning, and it set me thinking about the concept of taking a second look.
A first glance at any person, scene or situation provides us with only surface information. If we are living our lives at pace, it is likely that many of our perceptions, and the decisions based on those perceptions, are formed from ‘first glances’. When we pause for a ‘second look’, when we let our gaze linger a moment longer, something happens. It may emerge as an ‘Oh’ as we acknowledge what we hadn’t seen before, or it could emerge as a ‘Wow’ as we notice something that touches us deeper.
What would it be like if we began to take more ‘second looks’ at the world around us? Perhaps we would notice potential in a colleague or member of staff where before we had only seen issues. Perhaps we would begin to see opportunities where we had only seen obstacles, answers where we had only seen questions. Taking a ‘second look’ will heighten our awareness of our external environment because it helps make space for new thoughts.
But the real power of taking a ‘second look’ is in the heightened internal awareness that becomes possible. The simple act of pausing to take a ‘second look’ begins to shift the focus of our attention from information gathering towards reflection. There will be occasions when what begins as noticing more in the world around us, shifts towards greater internal awareness as we notice a new thought about ourselves.
Why not give it a try?
It was someone asking that question one day, several years ago that started off the process that led to a Company Director coming on one of our Executive Retreats. 'How did you get here?' someone politely asked before a meeting. 'How did I get here?' he thought - 'how did I end up here, sat in this meeting on this day talking to these people about this tiresome agenda?' He asked the question of course, because he really didn't want to be there that day....
As he pondered the question, he realised that he had slipped into autopilot over the last year or so. What was he doing? Where was the buzz? What real value was he creating, what purpose was he fulfilling? Dangerous, anarchic questions for a company Director...
His conclusions coming out of the retreat were interesting. He was in the right place. He had simply lost touch with why...what once had been fresh, exciting motives and purposes had somehow become burdensome duties. They didn't need to be. His time on retreat refreshed him and reminded him about some very important why's behind the how's. Important enough to put up with a bit of hassle and personal sacrifice.
It was a salutary reminder. If you're feeling a little blocked or trapped, don't look at the constraints, look at the choices....... All of us, wherever we are, for better or for worse, are where we are because we have chosen the path that brought us here.
In the same way that we are losing touch with our natural environment, we are losing touch with silence...
In silence, we become aware of the clutter of our thinking - so many half thought thoughts and distractions. Then, slowly, as we let these pass, we find deeper levels of thought; about more significant things, things that get pushed aside by the tyranny of the urgent over the important. As we grant ourselves access to this deeper thinking, interesting things start to happen. Change becomes truly possible.
Do you ever hear people in your organisation getting frustrated about unclear priorities, pressure, lack of time, focus or direction? These people have lost the art of being silent.
Being silent is an art, and we need to cultivate it. Unfortunately we are all woefully out of practice. Because silence makes us uncomfortable, we have developed endless routines and distractions to avoid it; externally, there's radio, TV, the mobile, endless chit-chat; internally there's email, newspapers, games, and the endless worry of to-do lists and minor hassles.
Silence is most valuable when snatched from the jaws of a frantic day. Take 5 minutes to find a quiet spot and simply sit in silence - see what happens. If you find it helpful (and you will!) try it again.
It is so good arriving somewhere new for the first time. Your eyes are open, alert - you notice all sorts of interesting things.
Perhaps you can take yourself back to a similarly memorable arrival – maybe a new job, a first visit, a holiday trip; or perhaps arriving somewhere familiar by a different means - by sea instead of land. In your minds eye try to picture what it was like, hear the sounds, feel the sensations. Notice what you were noticing, how alive it all seems. In that time of arriving, we are fresh - so many things become possible.
The irony, of course, is that we do lots of arriving. We just don’t do it very well.
One small way to bring a bit more depth to your day is to learn to arrive. Try it now......
Stand up, stroll around a little and then slowly, consciously sit down at your desk again. Be very conscious of your body as it settles down into the seat. Notice your weight on the seat, on your legs, your feet, your arms. Where are you comfortable/tense? What is this telling you?
Look around you - Is there anything that strikes you? Look again – what hadn’t you noticed before?
Notice who is around you. Spend a little time speculating about them – what are they thinking, working on, worrying about, feeling; what might be going on for them today.
Have a leisurely look at your agenda – what might today be like? What will be the interesting bits? Give yourself a real personal goal – what one simple thing would make today a day worth remembering?
You can do this any time during a day. For example, when you arrive at a meeting. It's a simple process:
- Start by noticing yourself physically arriving – allow yourself to be conscious of the physical sensations of entering a building, shaking a hand, settling down in a seat.
- Give yourself a second to notice your surroundings – what is in the room, particularly the little things. Allow things to strike you.
- Then allow yourself to notice the people present – how are they looking, what are they wearing? Try to put yourself in their shoes – what are their hopes, concerns? – what would be a good day for them?
- Finally focus yourself on your goal – what do you really want from this meeting, discussion, visit, activity?
In this way you become present to yourself, the situation and the others in it with you. Your chances of a successful outcome have now increased tenfold – because you are open to it.